This is a open note to the twisted @%#$ that invented the public restroom toilet paper dispenser that only allows ONE square at a time before it rips and turns away from you making you twist in unnatural and uncomfortable contortions to retrieve the next precious square.....you should be forced to eat nothing but truck stop chili and Taco Bell for three days, and then locked in a stall of your own design.

Tonight I decided to try something different and cook with wine....after three glasses I completely forgot why I was in the kitchen.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but stepping on a Lego in the middle of the knight will make me scream and dance around like a crazy woman.